My mom..

There are so many things I do not know about her, so many things that I will Never know about. Today, well, actually a few minutes ago, my mom called me and we started talking, about many things, boys, love, but then she drifted off talking about High School and how she had done drugs before she had me. I was so suprised..Actually It isn't really too suprising due to the fact that she gets drunk every other night and chain smokes.But, thats another story that really is irrelavent to this post.

The truth is, is that I am a control freak. I feel the need to know EVERYTHING about EVERYONE that I know. The cold, hard truth is that I may not know everything about myself either. Why are there so many secrets? Why must they kept? Is it for our own society...Or is there even a reason? There doesn't need to be a reason for everything. Or does there? There is so many things I think about, that it seems like it would all go away if I was kept ignorant to all of this stuff. But that's what I hate. I hate being ignorant.

I need to learn who I am. I need to learn why I am here. Or there isn't a reason for living is there?

These are all things I need to think about.